In our quest to prove that nothing is wrong with us, instead of living our lives as intended, we push back our spiritual beings as though they are second-rate citizens.
As you have learned so far about Factor-x, as a young child, once we get to the point where the mounting pressure of the environment—through our caregivers, parents, and society—cracks us, we most likely feel that something must be wrong with us, hence other people’s behavior towards us. From that point, we set out to disprove that anything’s wrong with us; from that moment on, we become second-rate citizens in our own bodies and lives. From then on, nothing else matters. Instinctively, it then becomes our life’s goal to disprove how and what we feel about ourselves; all we want is to disprove the existence of our Factor-x. This of course stays with us for the duration of our lives, even if we get beyond our Factor-x, by way of impacting on our lives in varying degrees afterward.
Yet even if you feel something’s missing, that your life doesn’t have meaning, or you wonder about the meaning of your life or life in general, you might never stop, even for a moment, to try to find the source of these feelings and thoughts. For most of us in this situation, we want to remedy things by following what we see around us: from the behavior of humankind in general. We follow the media, and get into designer this and designer that. We want better cars and
houses and so on. All this to disprove that something’s wrong with us. And this seems to be all we can do about our troubled feelings, because the real “us” was pushed back from a very young age because of our quest to disprove our Factor-x. All because our souls have been pushed to the background.
Our souls were pushed to the background. This is most likely why we feel our lives have no meaning, or that something’s missing from our lives. This is the origin of our inner conflict. Our soul, our spirit, is saying one thing to us, and our quest to disprove our Factor-x is saying another thing to us, hence the inner conflict.
Why else do you think governments would have massive budgets for, say, their defense forces? Why else would they pay billions for a vehicle of destruction even when many of their people are starving?
This writing isn’t about starving children, even though that dynamic is also a symptom of Factor-x woven into the fabric of our society. This isn’t about someone or some government setting things right either, but about ourselves: about one-by-one recognizing what we’re doing to ourselves and why. The point is, if we weren’t so busy living to disprove our Factor-x, we would see what we’ve created, what we’ve done to ourselves, and what society is doing to itself.
That’s what this writing is about: that we stop and look at our own lives and set it straight, or more accurately, that we recognize that we pushed back our spiritual beings in our own lives, and that unbeknownst to us, they’re being held hostage as second-rate citizens. None of this, unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately), applies to “mass fixing.” It doesn’t and can’t work that way. It needs to start with each individual to see the dynamic of what we’ve done to ourselves and are still doing to ourselves moment by moment.
It isn’t impossible, but it’s probably unimaginable for you, right now, to see beyond the current point in your life: to envision what your life might be like once you recognize your spiritual being, your soul, and give it a chance to come forward from where it’s being kept hostage within you. Yet in a way, you do get to see it moment for moment. Sometimes in minute ways, other times through lovely daydreams. It’s always there, just beneath the surface, wanting to be a part of your life, away from this quest we’re all on to disprove our Factor-x. It’s present in our inner conflicts, and it creates our daydreams: those lovely moments we escape to when things aren’t going so well.
So although we can’t quite imagine our lives when our spiritual beings are again in the forefront, we get a taste of it each day, albeit mostly only in its struggle to be part of our everyday lives.
Oh, and by the way, our spiritual beings aren’t something different from us; they’re a direct part of our lives that, generally speaking, we’re unaware of. Notwithstanding our spiritual beings, our souls are part and parcel of our lives, irrespective of whether we agree that our lives include spiritual beings or souls, and whether we accept this dynamic. Rather than something different or separate or invasive, our spiritual beings or souls are part of us, if mostly unknown and seemingly unfamiliar.
